Earlier this year, I tried counselling. I figured I’d been through a lot, and maybe it would be good to talk it through. One of the things we talked about, was how spontaneous (or not) that I am. Turns out, it’s more “not” lol.
I talked to my counselor a lot about how I plan every inch of my life, to get under the skin of how having a cancer diagnosis thrown at me has had an impact. That was most definitely not part of the plan.
My counselor asked me when the last time was that I did something off the cuff. Anything as small as just going out for the evening unplanned. I stared at her with a bit of a blank face.
I feel like there is almost a bit of pressure for twenty something child free adults to be impulsive. Say yes to everything at the drop of a hat. Jet off on a city break without a moments notice. Indulge in a last minute crazy night out. Because well, yolo. Isn’t that what the kids say these days?
We talked about how it would be good for me to do more spontaneous things, and whilst I sat and nodded along, the more I’ve thought about it, the more I’ve thought, why?
I do lots of fun things. I go out for dinner. See my friends. Plan days out and weekends away. So what if I feel more comfortable knowing what’s ahead of me this week (month/year lol)? It stresses me out when I think I have a quiet evening on the sofa ahead of me, and all of a sudden I’m having to put on real clothes and face the world. Or if I think I have a weekend to spend pottering about at home doing all the jobs I’ve neglected for a while, and all of a sudden I’m asked to go out and do something.
Yes, I might enjoy doing any of these things I trade my quiet time in for, but the thought of it often plays with my head. I could have a jam packed week with plans every single night, and I would be fine as long as I was prepared for it. A quiet week where everything changes last minute though? Hello stress, lol.
So no, I’m not the most spontaneous gal you’ll come across. But am I happy with that? Yes, so that’s all that matters.
That said, I don’t think it would be bad to sneak a little bit of spontaneity in here and there. I probably need to let go of the reigns just a little bit and say yes every so often. Have a day out with my husband because we haven’t had a day date for a while. Or just go to the cinema without having it scheduled in the week before. Jeez, maybe one day I will even go to a restaurant without looking at the menu beforehand. LOL.
Do you love being spontaneous? If you are, I’d love any tips you could share!