Why I Hated The First Trimester

OK, so I’m pretty sure this is breaking a few “mum to be rules”.
It’s the miracle of life, right? We’re supposed to cherish every moment?
Well guess what, I did not enjoy the first trimester.
Here’s why it really didn’t turn out to be the magical, exciting time I’d imagined…

1: Morning sickness is not a real thing. ALL DAY SICKNESS IS.

2: Ginger biscuits are gross.

3: Keeping a secret is hard. Especially when you feel sick. And need to eat ginger biscuits all the bloody time.

4: There’s tired, and then there’s next level “I’m growing a human” tired.

5: Your body starts changing. Not enough for you to feel pregnant, but enough for you to have a melt down over having NOTHING TO WEAR.

6: Oh yep, and nobody knows why you’ve started mysteriously piling on the pounds.

7: The saliva. There is always saliva.

8: Back pain. Erm, sorry…isn’t this supposed to come later?

9: The horse sized tablets that are disguised as pregnancy vitamins. It’s fun trying to swallow one of those down whilst also retching.

10: Nothing sounds good for dinner.

11: Boobs. In the way. Too painful.

12: You have to start eliminating things from your diet. Oh yeah, real fun when nobody knows your pregnant.

13: The super human level sense of smell. Somehow only comes into play when there is a bad smell. Really helps with number 1 on this list.

14: Throwing up ice cold squash that you just got out of the fridge is horrendous. I never want to drink squash again.

15: Throwing up and then wanting to instantly eat the exact same thing is weird af. But now I’ve missed my lunch, right?

16: Zero desire to do any of the things you used to find fun. Hello Instagram, remember me?

17: Stressing about how you’re going to afford maternity leave.

18: Constantly wondering whether there really is a baby in there.

19: Constantly worrying that the baby I haven’t yet seen might fall out of me at any given moment.

20: Constantly worrying.

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